I’m a mess, but I love you

Not in the great mood today. Not even sad, but yet I feel kind of stuck in the moment, as if where running out of of breath. Thoughts come and go, and at the same time I do not pay attention to them. Anyway, it’s only the result of my own stupid actions, and although I preach that we should go trough moments and emotional states, to go through this “stiffness” is really frustrating. I think that every unconfortable situation is embeded by fear; and this time the fear is the same used up old one: the fear of loss. And I think, not again, not the same ghost, the same unreasonable feeling; unreasonable because I have no reasons to create such a mess out of nothing. But behold creatures…!  In my world nothing is never a void, nothing it is always something. Something that begins with a simple thing, and suddenly, I’m on a rollercoaster carrying a dizziness which I cannot stop. I think too much, I know. I make things bigger than they are, I know. But I cross my heart when I say that beneath all this momentanous mess stands the fear of loosing you, honeybunny.